When I lived in Spokane, Washington during the early nineties, interracial relationships were not that common. Since I lived on a military base, my interactions were with various races and cultures. It was not until I went off base that I noticed separatism amongst the races. I recall a couple of instances where I went out on dates with white men to downtown restaurants, and I was the only black person in the entire establishment. Oftentimes, my date and I received icy glares or whispers as we walked bye. As a woman, I felt uncomfortable. As a black woman, I felt violated, because this is a free country. Therefore, we are able to date whomever we choose, regardless of race, nationality, color, or creed.
While dating a black man from the Seattle area, I discovered that his ex-wife was white, and he had a bi-racial daughter. Upon meeting his family, I realized that all of his brothers and nephews were in relationships with white women, and had fathered bi-racial children. To my surprise, the culture in that city was black men with white women. Whenever we visited his hometown, I noticed that trend everywhere we went. It seemed as if every child playing on the street was bi-racial.
Currently, I reside in Atlanta where interracial couples are far and few in between. Living in the south has helped me to realize that interracial couples are the exception and not the norm. Even now when a black man walks into a room with a white woman, some people stare and others whisper. It’s hard not to notice the reactions of others, because they do not try to conceal their displeasure. Since I have been in Atlanta, I have only seen three instances where a black woman was married to or dating a white man. I am convinced that people are creatures of habit, and we will adapt to our environment. Depending on where you live, and the acceptable dating pool to choose from, will determine your mating selection. I also believe that your friends influence your decisions, too. My cousin, whose mother is African, was born and raised in Atlanta, is married to a woman from Sweden. Oddly enough, all of his black male friends are either married to or dating a Swedish woman.
Copywritten by Dwan Abrams